"I am glad that I paid so little attention to good advice; had I abided by it I might have been saved from some of my most valuable mistakes.

~ Edna St. Vincent Millay~

Who's job is it to:

*keep the romance alive in a relationship

*pick up the extra slack

*communicate honestly

*address the hard issues

*clean the house

*etc, etc. etc. ??????

Let me tell you what I think, but this is just my limited opinion : )  It doesn't matter what kind of relationship you have;vanilla, kinky, D/s, poly, roommates, family....it is EVERYONE'S responsibility.  Each person involved in a relationship is responsible to be active in that relationship.

Now, specifically, I recently had a child.  Amazing gift!  Great changes and joys.  But, did our sex life take a turn for the worse?  Absolutely NOT!  My loving Dominant did make me wait the full 6 weeks after childbirth to have sex or play in anyway.  It was hard for me, but he incorporated other Dominant aspects into everyday life to help me feel secure.  Our time is more limited now, but we both make the effort and because of that, the intensity has risen to great heights.

Somedays, I am tired, I feel old, fat, unattractive, etc.  But my Dominant helps me to feel good about myself and his love for me, and I use that to help empower myself.  Somedays I am my own ego boost and I give that right back to him.  This give and take in all aspects of our relationship is what makes it work.  We talk about everything...even the hard and hurtful issues.  We don't yell at eachother, we don't judge or degrade the other's feelings.  I don't care what religion you are or how you were raised, if you let go of yourself just a little and look out for the best interest of the one you love, amazing things can happen and the bond forged is like no other.

But like the beginning quote says, if I hadn't made many of my own mistakes along the way, I could not have seen my joy now so clearly.

~Puddles~