From Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, 1600:

JULIET:
      'Tis but thy name that is my enemy;
      Thou art thyself, though not a Montague.
      What's Montague? it is nor hand, nor foot,
      Nor arm, nor face, nor any other part
      Belonging to a man. O, be some other name!
      What's in a name? that which we call a rose
      By any other name would smell as sweet;
      So Romeo would, were he not Romeo call'd,
      Retain that dear perfection which he owes
      Without that title. Romeo, doff thy name,
      And for that name which is no part of thee
      Take all myself.

Meaning: What matters is what something is, not what it is called.

So many people are looking for a label, a place to belong, a sense of security by being "in the group".    I used to think that way, and I was only a certain way with each certain group.  No one knew ME, they knew a PART of me.  I still at times try to box myself into a label, but it never works, I don't feel anymore "in" or honest with myself. 

ME: hippie,hopeful romantic, mother, sister, daugter, lover, sub, Dom, switch, 1950's housewife, bread-winner, meat lover, tree hugger, victorian Lady, renaissance wench, blah blah blah...it never ends : )

I am who I am. My name is Charmaine.  People call me Puddles.  But nothing about me changes.

Things are what they are.  You can call something a marriage, even if the partners are both cheating.  It is a formality, it is what it is.  Just because you call it something doesn't necessarily make it that, I personally try to call it like I see it, and if I am wrong I hope someone will politefully correct me and give me the accurate information.

Puddles